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If all of this is sounding a bit more daunting to you than just being single and getting shitfaced, don’t worry — you’re not alone. “When I go out with a group of friends, I don’t think there are more female partners or male partners than there used to be. I just think people are more connected and there’s an understanding, on both sides, of being single,” study author Natalie S. Schack Picciuto, an anthropologist at Boston University, told Bustle.
However, this doesn’t make it any less awkward for those in the dating pool. “I think the answer to casual sex is less about how to avoid being’slutty,’ and more about how to not be a dick to people.” Crump said. “This is a question that people who are comfortable with their own sexuality want to avoid these kinds of questions, which is limiting. For those who are not yet comfortable with their sexuality, they may not want to admit they are having casual sex.
Whether you do or don’t have casual sex, using dating apps to find potential partners presents its own set of challenges. “Dating sites are fraught with issues of transgressive bodies, bodies that are taboo in the hetero, white male-dominated landscape of mainstream dating,” says Zoe Margolis, who teaches gender and sexuality at City University in New York. “[But] everyone here is a gatekeeper of sorts: what is acceptable to display, how many drinks they can have, etc.”
The differences between American and British attitudes toward casual sex: Americans prefer to be the only one in their casual encounters.
Celebrities are the poster children of dating in the age of Tinder and groupies, but a lot of that is because they’re famous (duh), are around all the time, and are getting plastered whenever they have their (legally) shot glasses. But there are other celebrities who are quite casual in their approach to dating, and some are even leading by example.
In the UK, however, having casual sex is still pretty taboo. “We are good for the concept of casual sex, but we are not really good at implementing it,” says Coleen Nolan, a sex therapist and relationship coach. “People expect the lights to come on or the bill to come to the table, and then it’s too late.”
It can be hard to find someone who is truly happy to have casual sex — but it’s even harder to find someone who is really happy to have it without
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